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Sun November 15, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Sports by Brooks)
 
 
 
Tennessee Titans Owner Bud Adams so excited with win over Buffalo today that he flipped the bird at the Bills. Twice. (with pic)
source: sportsbybrooks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this polygonal creation presentation
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
10 worst predictions of the last decade. Websites will stop producing top X list as slideshows strangely absent
source: 2010.newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(256)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
New research concludes that lesbian couples make better parents than heterosexual couples. Still no cure for cancer
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(374)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
BAGHDAD (AP) - It's Saturday night at the Alwiyah Club, and 21-year-old Sarah al-Kimackchy is doing the hip thing - playing bingo
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
I cannot haz cheezburger? I CANNOT HAZ CHEEZBURGER?
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(240)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Oyster eaters tell FDA they can have their out of season mussels when they pry their oyster knives out of their cold, dead hands
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Attention John Mellencamp, the state of Indiana is holding $828 of your money, Larry Bird, they have $80 of yours. If not claimed in 30 days, the state keeps it
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
After 13 yrs of being a confidential narcotic informant, helping win 90 federal convictions, a Salvadoran man says he wants to get a regular job and settle down. How about deportation, instead?
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Branson)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Ham and beans 'good stuff'." Duh
source: bransondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you have in your possession a 1,500-pound historic Civil War cannon, Vallejo police would like a word with you
source: insidebayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Residents complaining about churches playing loud rock music. Bonus: Picture of what christian musicians may look like
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Not news: A person is jailed and charged with receiving stolen property given to him by a friend. News: it is a 12-year-old boy. Fark: over a 70 cent piece of chocolate
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Brockton Enterprise)
 
 
 
Police officer files request for overtime pay for all the time he spent preparing for and appearing in court for felony trial. Fark: He was the one on trial
source: enterprisenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these parachutists
source: af.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Thurston County Sheriff)
 
 
 
Law enforcement site warns parents: "If your kid is into Dungeons & Dragons, he's actually a computer addict ripe for grooming by Internet pedophiles"
source: co.thurston.wa.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(375)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Phrases soon to be banned from Massachusetts schools: "four eyes", "you dress like a girl", "you dance like a spastic monkey"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(cfnews13.com)
 
 
 
♫ Meet Darryl Bain ♫ High on cocaine ♫ New York cops, you better stop that fiend ♫ Tased from the front ♫ Handcuffed behind ♫ And you know he's on the coroner's mind ♫
source: cfnews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Study from the Institute of Henpecked Husbands shows that household chores could reduce a man's sperm count, thereby giving men the perfect escape clause from housework
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Seven great products for telling the world you're a rich dick
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(English Russia)
 
 
 
New Russian palace with mystery owner is being built near Moscow. Given that the owner got Google to strike it from their satellite images, subby's guessing it belongs to Dick Cheney
source: englishrussia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(CBS4.com)
 
 
 
When forced to choose between his home and a 300-pound Yorkshire pig named Strawberry, a South Florida man chooses the 300-pound Yorkshire pig named Strawberry
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Moose becomes first victim of Canada's newly armed border guards, squirrel escapes unharmed
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Looking for new source of income, teachers turn to selling lesson plans online. Looking for new source of revenue, districts turn to demanding a cut of the teachers' profits. Who wins? The intellectual property lawyers, of course
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Remember the swim club that didn't want the brown kids dirtying their pool? They've just filed for bankruptcy. Schadenfreude ensues
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Today's "anonymous man returns library books after 50 years and pays ridiculous fine because of guilt" is brought to you by Phoenix, Az
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this symbolic symbiosis
source: brandonwaybright.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
59-year-old teacher arrested for having sex with his high school students. Naw, just kidding, he's just threatening to shoot them, other teachers and school principal too
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Slashdot)
 
 
 
In response to lawsuit, TSA changes its rules, now stating that it can only screen for unsafe materials. I guess that means we can bring fingernail clippers and water bottles on planes again. Tag is for the rule that forbade them to begin with
source: news.slashdot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(338)
 


Sat November 14, 2009
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Not News: Police arrest college students for underage drinking. News: 105 of them at one party. Fark: "The house is about 200 yards from the police station"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this prickly pair
source: i4.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
The 35 most bizarre science fair projects. "Will there be minorities in heaven" and "Is ham tasty" included
source: andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Why atheists find religion later in life
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(969)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Last signed autograph of John F. Kennedy sells for a sum that could blow your mind
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Worker falsifies records about methane gas, faces 2 years in PMITA. Dude, blame it on the dog like the rest of us
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
When you are carrying 30 lbs of pot in your car try not to drive 40 mph over the speed limit past a cop
source: post-trib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lonely highway
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(DFW Star-Telegram)
 
 
 
Thought the chimp attack was fierce? "[H]e grabbed my leg with his mouth and went to jerking on me"
source: star-telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
We can't stress this enough: If you're claiming disability checks, it's best not to be a golf champion on weekends
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Another day another student/teacher sex story. With hottie female teacher picture goodness
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(218)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Career-limiting move of the day: While forwarding himself a copy of a "White Pride" email he wants to print out, State Trooper manages to send copies to almost 800 other state employees
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(632)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You think you've got a tough job? Imagine being the veterinarian who has to help an elephant lose 1,000 pounds. "We've had to lay down the law"
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Art caskets: Because nothing symbolizes death with dignity more than being laid out in a "Return to Sender" coffin
source: americancasketstore.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Cardboard cut-outs of police placed in stores to scare would-be thieves. Drunk decides to take one home with him
source: gazette-news.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
"I saw UFO beam up a buffalo"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
69-year-old goes online, finds an actual 13-year-old girl... who then gives her login info to the cops. You can see where this is headed
source: delawareonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The attention whore of Europe would like you to move in instead of just coming and going without spending any money
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
"You see an advertisement saying 'try it for free' for very little money, but soon after, you get a big charge on your credit-card bill. More ads... are offering free samples that are anything but free." Ric Romero? Yep
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(WBIR)
 
 
 
Cops who found magic mushroom grow house give up on counting them all, say it would be easier if the mushrooms would hold still and stop singing
source: wbir.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Some ChristWire)
 
 
 
Dramatic exposé on the "Golden Girls", how one show turned a generation of boys into homosexuals; sadly this article is not satire
source: christwire.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop what this woman is holding
source: farm4.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(The Daily Gleaner)
 
 
 
Merlot the cat, who went missing 17 months ago when he was less than a year old, has returned home for Caturday
source: dailygleaner.canadaeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1500)
 
(News-Times)
 
 
 
Middle school teacher resigns job she held for 22 years, after she's caught stealing small amounts of money from other teachers' purses. Must have needed it - her job only paid $95,000 a year
source: newstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
But honestly, who amongst us hasn't mistaken a uniformed police officer for a Sonic drive-through waiter
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Occupy.com)
 
 
 
Creepy weatherman leaves around 100 voicemails to girl he just met. Wonders why she won't call him back
source: lasvegasnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man charged with battery, grand theft, exhibition of a deadly weapon and a possible hate crime for holding a pen over his head. Penis Mightier
source: volokh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Comic books are doing surprisingly well even when big-boy books are struggling
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Occupy.com)
 
 
 
Commissioners strip the Las Vegas Strip of the Stripper Mobile. Won't someone please think of the strippers?
source: lasvegasnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Here's what you're not getting for Christmas: Mercedes' updated version of its 50-years-ago gullwing coupe. 563hp, 0-60 in under 3.8 seconds, and explosive door hinges
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
We have two weeks before the first experiment is done with the large hadron collider. It's a little too late to save us from the banality of 2012, more John Cusack
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
U.S. reports largest mumps outbreak in three years. Think of it like a swine flu outbreak, but serious
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Journal Star)
 
 
 
Benningan's being foreclosed on. Thank god our long national nightmare is over
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 


Fri November 13, 2009
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN points out the obvious: Hicks who rarely fly make it take 20 minutes for the rest of us to get on and off the plane
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(188)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Mental patient had been locked in a secure floor, but the nut bolted
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Don't be a pussy, Dr. Strange looks legit
source: maxim.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Some Dude)
 
 
 
FDA threatens to ban drinks containing both alcohol and caffiene; The Dude does not abide
source: medpagetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(256)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"The media fell hook, line and sinker once again for a military account of what happened during the tragedy... the cop most responsible for saving the day, it turns out, is a black man, not a white woman"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Freezer cash former Congressman gets put on ice for 13 years
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Apparently in Belgrade, 'swine flu' loosely translates to 'vampire invasion'
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photographer says he can find smiley faces in everyday objects :)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
For seven months L.A. Sheriff deputies have been trying to figure out who is slapping 'Who is John Scott' stickers inside MTA buses. You'll never guess who they caught
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Some Comrade)
 
 
 
Photoshop this parts carrying cart
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
In this weeks Smoking Gun Lineup: Mustache Ride
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(298)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you're the guy who stole the "2,554 Miles to Barstow" sign for the dozenth time, North Carolina would like a word with you. And that word is "Uncle"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's inanimate object that is secretly trying to kill you is (Spins wheel...) Oh my god, run for life, it's a glass top table
source: kirotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"It was just a routine car wash. Except there was no car -- and no clothing."
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
The lead singer of Missing Persons has been found in jail
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Manager trains employees for hold up situations by hiring man to burst in during buisness hours and put a gun to someones head. This should end well
source: slashfood.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Ohio is letting convicted mothers raise their children behind bars. What could go wrong? "Prison should be a place for punishment, not somewhere to raise babies."
source: news.cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Some meeper)
 
 
 
Amusing: High School principal tells his students they're not allowed to say "meep." Fark: Assistant principal reports an out-of-state attorney to the police for putting "meep" in an email
source: theodoramichaels.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(537)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Pickup lines from the world's greatest poonhound: "Want some coffee and want it up the a**?" "Make sure to get a waxing; I'm going to make all your holes very sore" (Not safe for work language)
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(246)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Man caught with over 1,000 spiders at airport, faces up to one year in jail. That's gotta sting
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Ted Haggard holds home prayer meeting: "For the people who come tonight, that means they believe in the resurrection in me." No word if the people participating in the resurrection came through the front door or the back door
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Child-molesting evangelist Tony Alamo receives 175-year prison sentence that will surely involve no molestation of any sort whatsoever
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Girlfriend replaces her deployed boyfriend with a blow-up doll. Farkers nod knowingly, understanding the comfort that only a polyvinyl chloride mate can provide
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
NASA's glass is more than half filled on whether there is water on the moon
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this piece of vintage jewelry
source: img39.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
City to celebrate Christmas with no reference to Christianity, but will have a "spectacular festive celebration" including a solar-powered disco, a circus and a fairy on stilts
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(327)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Also admitted he watched television shows, such as women's volleyball, that sexually stimulated him, a violation of the terms of his release
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
♪That deaf, dumb, blind dog / Sure is world record tall.♪
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Friday Photo Fun. Grandma has been a bad girl. Match her with her crime. Contest ends at 4pm Eastern
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Some Correctness)
 
 
 
Superhero Smackdown Semifinal: Superman vs Wolverine
source: thecorrectness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(263)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Melbourne night club bans metrosexuals in an effort to reduce violence, because in a bar fight you want to look out for the guy with orange skin and perfect hair who's putting chapstick on his lips
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Becuase nothing quite says "I love you" like 30% off a cordless rotary saw
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
British gardeners urged to urinate on their plants to help them grow better. How very european
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
Roommates' dispute over soccer match ends in a shootout
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Man thought he could elude police after a shootout by changing into a t-shirt and pajama pants. He thought wrong
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Police arrest the wrong woman after her identity was stolen. Oops
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Indian eunuchs allowed to choose a gender of "other" for ID cards, a political move that took balls
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Contestant who died on the set of the reality show "Wipeout" had a rare genetic condition that lead to a stroke, not because his brain tried to strangle him in shame for appearing on the show "Wipeout" as earlier believed
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Fisherman gets 233-pound catfish, hernia
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Spanish government gets a grip and decides to take a hands-on approach with a major new advertising campaign to teach children the joys of masturbation
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(Chronicle.com)
 
 
 
"My parents pay for my rent, college tuition, and entertainment, and my trust fund will ensure that I'll never actually have to get a job. FML"
source: chronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(572)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Sing us a song of your piano scam, sing us a song tonight. Well we're all in the mood for some forgery, and you took our money all right
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop these cautious commuters
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
14 year-old boy flashes bus. Woman on bus begins screaming hysterically. Bus driver panics and drives bus into police station. Ta-daa
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
♪Just a couple days ago / I set out on the trail / Lookin' for a plate of mushrooms / Not ones you get on sale / Pains got bad, and pains got worse / I guess you know the tune / Oh Lord, sick in Lodi again.♪
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
In the fine American tradition of really uncomfortable Thanksgivings, Sarah Palin says Levi Johnston "welcome" to come for dinner. That's family values you can believe in, by golly
source: feeds.people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(255)
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
In case you don't know what a bonobo is, there was an ugly-assed one born at the Jacksonville Zoo. W/pic
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Whoever left a sawn-off alligator head in a rural field in Yorkshire, England, congratulations, you scared the crap out of a dog walker
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 


Thu November 12, 2009
(Some Cook)
 
 
 
Drew's list of 'seasonal' stories is woefully incomplete without "annual turkey baster search"
source: aldenteblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Experts wonder if the upswing in retail theft may be connected to the unemployment rate. What the hell kind of "experts" do we have analyzing this data?
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
MPAA shuts down an entire town's wi-fi because one person illegally downloaded a movie. Take that, illegal downloaders
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(373)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Verizon has found a way to charge you for accidental keystrokes
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Coming to a hipster douche near you: 1890s fashion. 'Cause nothing says "manly" like knee socks, britches and a cape
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(275)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Tennessee man found asleep in a ditch with a loaded rifle and a bottle of moonshine
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
If there are aliens on other worlds, did Jesus die for their sins, too? After all, every Gelgamek is sacred
source: timesonline.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(257)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Murder suspect tells jury he has the cure for global warming, knows how to win in Afghanistan, and that George Bush was just a figurehead while he really ran the country. It should come as no surprise that he represented himself in court
source: bnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
...and when they covered the Jews' cars in sticky-notes I said nothing, because I was not a Jew
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this barrier balancer
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
You can make your very own Tamiflu at home. I'm sure this will end well
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ohio couple married 61 years and died one day apart. There is no escape. Did you hear me? NO ESCAPE
source: jacksonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Elmo vs Spiderman vs Chewbacca: LA's superhero turf wars heat up again
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
John King to replace Lou Dobbs, says CNN. Dobbs' wife reportedly pleased
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Guy's cell phone minutes run out, so he calls 911 five times to see if anyone will have sex with him
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
*POP*
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(217)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman wins $1M McDonalds Monopoly prize. Plans to use winnings on new house, car, angioplasty
source: dailyfinance.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(264)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
You went full North by Northwest, dude. Never go full North by Northwest
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Yug Emos)
 
 
 
Not news: ex-soldier finds a gun in his garden - Still not news: man hands gun into police - Fark: Now faces five years in prison for possessing a firearm
source: thisissurreytoday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(538)
 
(Some Law-Talking Dude)
 
 
 
Bow wow wow, yippie yo, yippie yeah, Bow wow yippie yo yippie yeah (c)
source: blogs.findlaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Welcome to the internet, where men are men, women are men, and that 14 year old girl you're propositioning is actually your wife
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(425)
 
(Galveston Daily News)
 
 
 
Using only a cell phone and a pelican, man turns his $2 million Bugatti into a submarine
source: galvestondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(162)
 
(Daily Record)
 
 
 
Unknown substance found on NJ Transit train. Probably cleanser
source: dailyrecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
90% of students at City University of New York can't do basic algebra. So, you know...just like the rest of the country
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(588)
 
(Daily Press)
 
 
 
"Main Street merchants want crack at market" in Santa Monica, says poorly worded headline. Presumably this would be gourmet organic locally-grown crack
source: smdp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
14-year-old boy attacked by cougar, police say. His girlfriend isn't amused
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Spiritualist" police trainer who called for the British police to include mediums and psychics in their investigation sues for discrimination after his bosses manage to stop laughing for long enough to sack him
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(mlive.com)
 
 
 
First Paragraph: Police say a Twin Lake man broke into a woman's mobile home last week, pulled out a clump of her hair, punched her in the face and stole two couch cushions before leaving
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(The Courier)
 
 
 
Just in case Scotland didn't have enough problems already, now the beaches are radioactive
source: thecourier.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
In a strange twist never before seen, teen uses Facebook to keep himself OUT of jail
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Journal Gazette)
 
 
 
Evidently unable to afford a trailer home, man arrested for operating a mobile meth lab on his moped
source: journalgazette.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop what this newlywedded Farker and his wife should be holding
source: i625.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
"Brain-delving boffins in key monkey-butler breakthrough"
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Royal Air Force display team announces its first female pilot. For safety's sake, she will be surrounded by men in bright red planes
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
After putting out an arrest warrant on Spider-Man for hitting a guy, police find that they have not one, not two, not three, but FOUR Spider-Men to deal with
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Welfare recipient and sometime model caught with four pounds of coke in her Benz. She is a naughty person, and subby votes for the Castle Anthrax punishment
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Man-gagement rings, made of masculine materials like steel, tungsten and cobalt, are gaining popularity among brides that buy them, jewelers that sell them, and douche bags that wear them
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(483)
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Health officials advising against kids sitting on Santa's lap this year because of swine flu
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(York Press)
 
 
 
Now I'll turn this dial - let me know if your view of me masturbating gets more or less focused
source: yorkpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(3 News New Zealand)
 
 
 
100-year-old refuses to retire, signing five-year lawnmowing contract. So keep off it
source: 3news.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Wife pulls knife on husband because he took her vodak away. He holds her at bay with a chair while dialing 911
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Gallant parks his car in legally designated spaces and treats authority figures with respect. Goofus punches parking enforcement officers, drags them into the road, and bites them on the face
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Guy calls police to report his roommates are smashing potatoes over imaginary woman's head
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
"Stripper-mobile" just proves everything about Las Vegas has become absolutely ridiculous. That sound you hear is Dino and Frank spinning in their graves (with news video)
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
What does a death sentence really mean? If you're in California, it means years and years of living in better conditions than the lifers get
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
The curious case of heroin buttons
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Pregnant teen arrested for burglary, goes into labor while being arrested. I hear mug shots make great birth announcements
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this iguana
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(WLUK)
 
 
 
Ron Jeremy showing college campuses he's a master debater
source: fox11online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
A Massachusetts man is suing Bon Jovi, Time Warner and Major League Baseball for $400 billion because being stupid just doesn't pay enough
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(My Fox Dallas)
 
 
 
Police accidentally ship 25 lbs of pot to prison in a crate marked as fruit. Fortunately the inmates who discovered mistake reported it immediately to prison authorities
source: myfoxdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Aussie bomb sniffing dog lost in Afghanistan desert for a year and presumed dead is rescued by US soldier. With happy one-year-late-bath pics. Subby has something in his eye
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 236: "Destroyed." Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 


Wed November 11, 2009
(Some Seafood Guy)
 
 
 
Problem: Humans eat sharks, so sharks can't eat stingrays, so stingrays eat oysters. Solution: Humans eat stingrays
source: marketplace.publicradio.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Colorado's medical marijuana community wants to police itself, what could possibly go bong?
source: cbs4denver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
British MPs preparing to beat off invading horde of Olympic hookers, which seems backward to submitter
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Pizza delivery guy parks his car in a fire lane. Fortunately, he left the engine running, so a good samaritan saved him from a ticket by stealing the car
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
The coolest street scenes of Havana you'll see all day
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Kansas City teacher fired after making jokes about Florida. Students erect signs to save his job
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Banana robber to face trial. He's expected to file a peel
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this building site break
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Imposter busted for posing as decorated Marine. Bonus: Charade was discovered at H.S. reunion when he ran into a real Navy Commander
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(859)
 
(PDN)
 
 
 
The coolest photo of Devils Tower you've seen since your routine training flight went missing in 1945
source: pdnphotooftheday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(212)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Find yourself recently single and with no clue how to proceed? You are in luck. Come on out to the first ever Divorce, Separation and Bereavement fair
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(355)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Remember when New London took those homes and the Supreme Court said it was OK because they had this great development plan worked out with Pfizer...? Yeah, it didn't quite work out
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(437)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The deep-sea crab that eats trees....who knew you can grow trees at the bottom of the ocean
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these masks
source: af.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
New Jersey judge allows quadriplegic man to buy guns. "He plans to mount the gun on his wheelchair and operate it with a breathing tube"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(286)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Next time you think about yelling at your three-year old for digging in the yard, remember this story
source: gnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(3 News New Zealand)
 
 
 
Kyrgyzstan rejects UN ban on death penalty, offer of vowels
source: 3news.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(368)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
You know the price of college textbooks is getting out of hand when one gang of thieves can steal $90,000 of them from local libraries
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
AMA calls for more marijuana research, Doritos
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(313)
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Problem: kids selling candy didn't raise much money for their middle school last year. Solution: sell grades instead
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
How about a bra that doubles as a putting green with a built in speaker, pockets for extra balls and tees, and a detachable flag pin that serves as a score pin? Thanks, Japan
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(862)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
San Francisco Fark / Mentally Incontinent joint book signing and Fark Party, Thursday Nov 12 7pm Borders Books Stonestown Galleria. Drew and Joe will be on hand
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Not news: four muggers rob man. News: the man is an Army reservist. Fark: they return his wallet, apologize, and thank him for his service. UltraFark: one of the muggers gives him a fistbump
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
On the 11th hour, of the 11th day, of the 11th month the guns fell silent. Thanks to all the men and women who gave their lives for the country and braved the senselessness of war
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(474)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Okay then, your request to leave Scientology has been approved, all that remains is for you to claim your free fisting from Tom Cruise
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(179)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
PROTIP: If you're trying to lure cats out of hiding, don't use a lighter. It can only end one of two ways: badly and really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really badly
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Some new fathers pass out cigars after the birth of their newborn. Others gather up the placenta and make it into a bendable teddy bear
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Get run over by a secret service agent once, shame on you. Get run over by a secret service agent twice, shame on...you
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
To our Fark Veterans on Veterans Day: Here is a thread full of snark and thanks
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(416)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Three more scientists quit in protest at the Great Nutt Sack Controversy
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Britons are amongst the ugliest people in the world, according to a new report from the Institute of People with Functional Eyes
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(227)
 
(Salem News)
 
 
 
In an effort to win Afghan hearts and minds, the U.S. military sends more lawyers
source: salemnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Company in charge of UK rail network transporting 200 employees to conference by bus because train tickets are too expensive. Ironic and Obvious tags forced to stand after Amusing tag gets last seat onboard
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Man teaches kids how to stay out of gangs, protect the goal during shootouts
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Meet the man who makes beer with such ingredients as ham and cheese, Bac-O-Bits, peanut butter and chocolate, and Nutella
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
After numerous civilian deaths and a long campaign of stonewalling, brinksmanship, and coverup, independent inspectors will finally allowed inside. Iran? Guess again
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Let this be a lesson to you all, make sure you have a good nap before you try to pick any locks
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Man up to no gouda attempts to steal three blocks of cheese. Men in bleu say no whey, arrest him before he can edam up and achieve his feta accompli
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Duly noted in this obituary: Giant clanking testicles do not stop one from giving one's windscreen a proper cleaning, even if it means nearly stalling out the plane to lean out the window while under German fire
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
British woman christens her new pet dog. In a pub. With beer
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Darth Vader ends his tenure as a Dark Lord of the Sith and finds new work as a cathedral gargoyle. He still finds your lack of faith disturbing
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Japanese government imposes waistline standard in attempt to avoid American-style epidemic of obesity: 33.5 inches for men, 35.4 inches for women
source: food.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Jane Fonda says her sex life at 71 is better than ever, provided you don't get impaled by her metal hip
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Faced with a high school student wanting to bring her girlfriend to the prom, the principal does the only rational thing and threatens to cancel the prom (w/pic of what a high school lesbian might look like)
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(379)
 
(Island Packet)
 
 
 
Liquor store owner charged with being unable to recite her ABCs, or something. The Sheriff even has a special team for alphabetical enforcement
source: islandpacket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this carnival carriage
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Man threatens 9-year old girls with a nail-gun unless they play 'spin-the-bottle' with him. Prosecutor: "He promised chocolate cake - but there was no chocolate cake". That's right man - get him on false advertising
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
If you're in Brazil and can read this, congratulations, you're not in the half of that country that's lost power
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
United Airlines pilot E. Vermont Washington charged with being in a drunken state (or two) at Heathrow
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Middle school food fight leads to 25 arrests. FOOD FIGHT
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 


Tue November 10, 2009
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
High Fructose Corn Syrup raises hypertension risk 87%. Put down the Mountain Dew and back away slowly
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(289)
 
(WAAY TV)
 
 
 
News: Man robs home. Fark: He leaves behind part of his nose
source: waaytv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(USA Today)
 
NewsFlash
 
"DC Sniper" is pining for the fjords
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(562)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Barely breathing frat pledge registers BAC of nearly .500. Welcome to Phi Delta Theta, son
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(233)
 
(L.A. Metblogs)
 
 
 
The traffic sign from L.A. Story has a cousin who lives in a gas pump at a 76 station in the Valley
source: la.metblogs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Chinese catwalker
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fort Hood shooter is "aware that he's a suspect" according to his attorney
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(224)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Man comes home from vacation. No, wait. Let me re-phrase that
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Ice-floe rescuers in Canada need to be rescued by ice-floe rescuers, who need to be rescued by ice-floe rescuers
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Diapernaut gets a year of probation
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Google to Murdoch: "If publishers want their content to be removed from Google News specifically all they need to do it tell us."
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(205)
 
(Daily Herald)
 
 
 
Pre-paralegals from some community college defeat pre-laws from Yale, Villanova, Boston College, Wake Forest, Boston University, Dartmouth and Wellesley at a mock trial competition
source: dailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
"Anyone who found a block of cheese is asked to contact police."
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Marine reservist attacks Greek Orthodox priest with a tire iron, then calls police to brag he's caught a terrorist
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Minnesota traffic snarled after a fatal four-cow accident. Witnesses at the scene describe udder chaos
source: inforum.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Mass shooting outside Portland, OR, up to 10 victims
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(542)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Move over, al Qaeda--there's a new jihadi code in town, and it doesn't like the way you play
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(190)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
3 years ago, Chinese calendar year of the cow... Mad Cow disease. 2 years ago, Chinese calendar year of the bird... Avian flu. This year, Chinese calendar year of the pig... Swine flu. Next year is the year of the cock...Anybody else worried?
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Man charged for allegedly assaulting construction worker with a backhoe. Officials say the victim was lucky he didn't suffer grader harm
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Evidence found of plot to kill cartoonist, but details are sketchy
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
♫The best part of waking up is a CTA bus crashing into the side of your house♫
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
The president calls him..."The Crustmaster"
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hello, insurance company, yeah a grizzly bear ate my airplane
source: blogs.timeslive.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Man charged with sexually assaulting 14-year-old girl over several months, even though he paid her mom each time, fair and square
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(228)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you're a cop it's probably best not to wait three days to send a runaway home. You might just get fired. Also you shouldn't really have sex with him either
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Not news: Woman buys $300 worth of stuff from Menards. Still not news: They don't charge her for $5.99 worth of drill bits. Fark: They make her pay $150 to not call the cops on her for shoplifting
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(289)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Possible hostage situation in Jefferson City, MO government building. Information is sparse, but witnesses say police are moving on up
source: primebuzz.kcstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(205)
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
In honor of the Marine Corps birthday here is a list of notable Marines. Jonathan Winters? Really? Semper Fi
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(295)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Apparently, more people will want to buy a product that is offered at a cheaper price compared to the higher prices for that product at competing sellers. Huh
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Rubber baby buggy bummer
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Pepper spray + hand dryer + McDonalds = bad idea
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
All-out brawl erupts at wedding after guests upset when groom throws money on the dance floor for kids to pick up. Bonus: Woman puts the groom's 74-year old grandmother in a choke hold
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man and mess in Marseille
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Landslide in India kills 42 and demolishes hundreds of homes. To top it all off, they're going to need a new deli
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Families struggle with science, faith when viable eggs are frozen in lab; it's certainly not an over easy decision
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Government tells church it can't feed the poor
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(413)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
You'd think that a community's problem with pedestrians who don't know how to cross streets would be self-correcting, but no
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Take the rate of off-label marketing, A, multiply by the probable rate of prosecution, B, multiply by the average fine, C. A times B times C equals X. If X is less than the cost of a drug approval study, we don't do one
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(193)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Boston University demonstrates, again, why the school should not be allowed to start experimenting with Ebola and plague in downtown Boston
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Gunman enters New York high school, takes principal hostage. Party at Lloyd Dobler's house stat
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Salem News)
 
 
 
Principal uses automated calling system to warn parents that students could be suspended for using made-up word at school. It's not news, it's Meep
source: salemnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Teen finds himself trapped on an ice floe with three polar bears. Teen wins
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(221)
 
(KLTV)
 
 
 
Couple demand roadside cross and flowers be removed from their property. You know, the ones marking the spot where their pit bulls mauled a 10-year-old to death
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(624)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
FBI reviewing its internal evaluation of Ft. Hood shooter Nidal, considering upgrading their assessment from "Harmless" to "Mostly harmless"
source: fe5.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(WHIO)
 
 
 
Man arrested for fighting with his girlfriend over a crack pipe. Oh, and trying to stab her. And trying to set her on fire. And trying to set her truck on fire
source: newstalkradiowhio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Real men of genius: Today we celebrate you, Mr "posts a personal ad looking for lesbians to impregnate" guy
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Lacrosse Tribune)
 
 
 
Seven-point buck deer loses antler battle with elk. Fark: Because the elk was a concrete lawn ornament
source: lacrossetribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Some Message)
 
 
 
Caption the text message that made Leonardo DiCaprio grin from ear to ear
source: img4.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Police officer: your breath test shows no alcohol, enjoy the rest of your night. Driver: Thanks officer, but can you make sure the mystical dragons aren't still following me?
source: themercury.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Newson6)
 
 
 
Make sure your cell phone is locked so you don't accidentally dial numbers. Numbers like 911. While you're discussing a drug deal
source: newson6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these spirited students
source: trinityjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Bunnies with penis implants. Hugh Hefner not amused
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
In a prelude to 2012, North and South Korea are shooting at each other
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
We miss George Bush because Obama has been attacked by a vampire. Or something like that
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(358)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Mount Alvernia College suspends student for shaving her head to raise money for cancer research. Stay classy, Mount Alvernia College
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 


Mon November 09, 2009
(www.catholic.org)
 
 
 
Catholics discover that Scientologists are forced by Scientology to have abortions. Xenu runs for cover while Farkers try to find enough popcorn
source: catholic.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(582)
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Douchebag cyclist runs red lights and stop signs, rides on sidewalks and roads where cyclists are not allowed, and is completely indifferent to the traffic congestion he is causing. It's okay though, because he is the mayor of Washington DC
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
♫ At the car wash ♫ Busted at the car wash, yeah ♫ Cops nabbed them for indecency ♫ At the car wash, yeah ♫
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Liquor Store Clerk Held Up by Screwdriver." No word on what the screwdriver used for a weapon
source: am1150.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Slideshow of famous people who've had swine flu. Now hopefully the sickness will get the media attention it deserves
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shovelful of dirt
source: tsa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The federal government is willing to pay up to $66,542 plus living benefits if you don't mind mushing 31-dogs across Denali National Park
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
"The bullet zipped over fields and pasture from the south as Long's car traveled west from her aunt's house. The two would meet at a point on 307th Street at precisely the same instant."
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(169)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Sometimes there are signs that you've chosen the wrong profession. Bus driver, on his first day back after being suspended for texting while driving, runs over student
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Strollers recalled due to C) amputation
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Tips on how to raise a vegetarian child so that he grows up to be healthy, happy and insufferably self-righteous just like you
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(763)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Vandal causes oil spill into Nova Scotia river. Not a slick move, but oil bet he thought it was a gas
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Drew)
 
 
 
It's the "still not quite Thanksgiving but there's not much to talk about" edition of the Fark Betting Line, as well as some of our favorite Headlines of the Week for 11/1 - 11/7
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Let there be light -- And when you're done reading, you can eat this bacon lampshade
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
Photoshop this not so real moon landing
source: history.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Computer viruses are now downloading child porn to your computer then calling the Feds, for the lulz
source: tech.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(319)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
This just in: Fort Hood shooter described as "scary" by someone's mom
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(221)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Connecticut's gum control laws are having little effect on the state's gum crimes
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
"Thanks to $25 million in recovery money, America's poorest city now has hippos."
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(Wired UK)
 
 
 
The coolest Martian jellyfish you'll see all day
source: wired.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Brazilian student expelled from Brazilian university for wearing dress so short you could see her Brazilian
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(368)
 
(Topless Robot)
 
 
 
Pizza rolls are truly the pinnacle of human scientific endeavor. No, seriously
source: toplessrobot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Gay rights in Sweden take a bold step forwards and sideways with the consecration of their first lesbian bishop
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Two decades after the Berlin Wall came down, many in the once divided city no longer even remember where it stood. Hey Germany, that's why we use slogans here in the States. 9-11-2000, Never Forget
source: english.aljazeera.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(319)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
Ladies and Gentleman, the train is about to enter a tunnel
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Bank robber had a banana in his pocket, was not happy to get arrested after leaving his wallet on a bank counter
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(National Hurricane Center)
 
 
 
Milk ✔ TP ✔ Beer ✔ Flashlight ✔ Overexcited weatherman on TV ✔ . It's your Hurricane Ida discussion
source: nhc.noaa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
It's nice that you make the effort to hand write your letters of condolence, but you should really make sure you spell their names right
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
Is that the ambulance service? Could I have a can of lager please?
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
School headmaster demoted to school headlessmaster
source: theaustralian.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Here's a hint: If you're a deer who's making a break from the National Zoo, don't get so excited by the people cheering you on that you jump into the lion's den
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(174)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Armed thug places order at McDonald's before he robble-robbles the place
source: theaustralian.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
How 7,000 Vermont residents were almost encased in a mile-long plastic dome
source: hplusmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this beach beauty
source: farm4.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
Woman deceives her husband and friends into believing she had breast cancer and needed treatment. She spent $10K they raised on a boob job
source: wacotrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Girl, 12, gives birth to boy for her 15-year-old husband. In Tennessee? West Virginia? No, New South Wales, Australia
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
12-year-old girl suspended from school for piercing her nose, which perfectly normal in India, not as normal in Utah as multiple moms
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
When searching for your dog, always look under car first before reaching underneath. That shadow might really be an alligator instead
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Cape Cod Online)
 
 
 
State Senator forgets he's supposed to make drugs sound bad, not cool; describes Oxycontin as "a rocket ship to heroin." Every kid knows rocket ships are cool
source: capecodonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
After her husband gets locked up for dealing meth, pissed-off wife goes undercover, takes down major meth ring. Hell hath no fury like a Latina who ain't getting any
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 

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